Request Newsletter | Bridal Online Website | Return To Main Page
| |
| |
|
Marriage & Wedding Information |
|
|
|
Ten Tips for Writing Your Perfect Wedding Vows
1. Start with a nice clean piece of paper (lavender is good, but any kind will work). Down the left side of the page, write the numbers 1-10. Now - without stopping to think about it, fill in this page! Write down the first 10 things that come to mind in response to this sentence: "I love (my partner's name) because . . . " Set this piece of paper aside. 2. Now - how about YOU? What do YOU bring to this union? What promises will you make? Take another sheet of paper, and write 'em down - don't worry about spelling, grammar, or anything else at this point. Just write down 4-5 things you want to promise this very special person with whom you want to spend your life. ? Do you promise to be there in bad times as well as good? ? Do you promise to be faithful with your body as well as with your mind and heart? ? Do you promise to support your partner even when he/she isn't perfect? ? Do you promise to share all your resources? Some? ? What about if he/she gets sick? What about if you have a serious fight? You get the idea . . . what are you promising in this union? 3. Think about the language you will use to claim your partner and name your relationship. When you introduce your beloved, what words will you use? Husband? Wife? Spouse? Partner for Life? What energy does each of these have for you? If you don't like one for some reason, throw it out. . . but before you start writing you vows, decide . . . what language will you use? This is a decision you need to make together . . . so start early, and give this as much time as it takes. 4. OK, after you've done steps 1-3, and you've got at least two pages of writing and one decision made - set it all aside. Do something else, preferably with your partner, and preferably fun. Like Christmas trees, weddings get too much "stuff" hung on them, Make yours beautiful, by stepping aside from the stress for a day or two. Go out and remember WHY you love . . . go and play. 5. Done that? Now it's time to make a BIG DECISION. Are each of you going to write your own vow, or do the two of you want to say the same thing? You don't have to, you know - some of the most beautiful ceremonies I've celebrated had each partner saying something different . . . But here's a trick: If you're each creating your own unique vow, why not insert a sentence at the end symbolizing the fact that you come together as unique individuals, and, without surrendering your individuality, you are creating a beautiful, shared union. Here's an example of words each partner might use to complete his or her unique vow: John, I accept you as my husband. I Tracy, embrace you, Susan, as my partner for life. 6. It's time to go back to the papers you wrote in Steps 1 and 2. If you're working together, you'll have fun sharing those pages, and seeing where you overlap . . . Use colored pencils or highliters to lift up what you have in common - and make those promises and statements of love just leap off the page. 7. Now, whether you're working alone or as a couple, it's time to prioritize. Which is fancy language for saying, OK, if I have to cut two of these promises off the list, which ones will they be? Nibble at your lists, removing the things that are just a little less juicy, until you're left with three or four things you love . . . and about the same number of things you promise. 8. Copy these over onto a brand new, clean page. (It's amazing what a difference a clean sheet of paper can make - trust me on this!) 9. One more question . . . this is a wedding, a celebration of your union, presumably for life. Will your vows indicate a time frame? Some couples use phrase like: "Through all our years, and in all that life may bring us . . . " "For the rest of my days" "As long as we both shall live" "lifetime partner." "partner forevermore." Whatever works for you, a wedding or service of union vow should contain a phrase that indicates the duration of your commitment. ( If you've come this far, I hope you've decided to promise your commitment for life.) 10. Read your vow out loud to a trusted someone other than your partner. Does it sound like you? How does it feel to say these words aloud? Have you said anything you'd be embarrassed to say in public? Are there any tongue-tanglers in there? (It's amazing how seemingly simple phrases turn complex when it's time to speak!) Make whatever minor changes you need, and then Stop. Feel good about what you've done - for you have created one of the greatest gifts you will ever make. (c) Maureen Killoran, 2004 Maureen Killoran, MA, DMin, is a Unitarian Minister and a life coach in private practice in Hendersonville, NC. You can learn more about her services as a wedding consultant and officiant at http://www.spiritquest.ws . . . and about her coaching practice at http://www.spiritquestcoaching.com
MORE RESOURCES:
Wedding - Google News |
|
|
|
RELATED ARTICLES
Expert Tips on Making Your Own Wedding Stationery Vital tips on making your own wedding invitations - by Claire, Invitation Express Wedding Stationery SoftwareIf you want to design and print your own wedding stationery and don't know where to start, here are a few tips that hopefully will get you on your way.You should select your design before firming up your ideas on paper and cards etc. Outdoor Wedding Ceremonies - Keeping Your Guest Comfortable According to a survey conducted in 2003 by Bride's magazine, 15% of all couples choose an outdoor wedding, and that trend is growing. But with a all of the beauty and simplicity that an outdoor wedding brings, it also brings added anxiety from the force known as Mother Nature. Mens Wedding Bands - A Whole World Of Choice Mens wedding bands are an emerging phenomenon. Whilst women have worn engagement and wedding rings for years, men are just starting to catch up. Las Vegas Theme Weddings "Las Vegas theme weddings are the envy of the world. Nowhere else on planet earth can you find such a dazzling array of choices for a theme wedding. 11 Things to Remember in Planning Your Wedding Every woman dreams of her own wedding. May it be a small gathering in a picturesque orchard, a grand ball in a gigantic castle or a funky wedding along the coastline, she wants it planned and tailored to her wishes. Personalized Wedding Favors Personalized wedding favors are among the most popular of gift selections made by brides and grooms to show appreciation to the guests sharing in their wedding day. Traditional ceremonies have made wedding favors a part of the celebration since the sixteenth century. Heavenly Bahamas Honeymoon Resorts Celebrating under the attentive care of Bahamas honeymoon resorts, there might be no better way to commence a marriage. Consisting of over 700 mostly-uninhabited islands, Bahamas has a lot of territory to encounter during your trip. Loose Moissanite Stones, A Great Way to Buy Your Moissanite Jewelry Moissanite is fast becoming the new diamonds. The newest jewelry stone on the market, moissanite is fashionable. Choosing your Wedding Favors How do you give thanks and make a lasting impression on your guest? The answer is simple, with a wedding favor. A wedding favor is a small token of appreciation for your guest to treasure and remember your special wedding day. The Monogram Theme Wedding Monograms are a huge trend in weddings, to the point where they feature strongly in some, and in others, provide the actual theme. And what's not to like about monograms? They're elegant, understated, versatile, and a dramatic visual reminder of your new life together. The Brides Greatest Ally On Friday, 1st May 1835, Mr Charles Dickens, the creator of "David Copperfield" and "Please, sir, can I have some more?" was the happiest of mortals. He had proposed and had been accepted. Design Your Own Beautiful Wedding Ring It used to be that if you wanted to buy a nice custom-made wedding ring, you'd have to visit some fancy high-end jewelry store and be willing to part with a large portion of your wedding budget.Well that's still the case for some people, but thanks to our modern times it's now possible for you and anyone else who wants a custom wedding ring to create a unique diamond wedding ring from the comfort of your own home. Let Your Wedding Flowers Speak the Language of Love Congratulations! You have found the man of your dreams and are getting married. What a wonderful time in your life - full of promise, hope, and happiness. Displaying Your Wedding Bouquet The great day has come and gone, and you are now happily married. You now want to showcase your silk bouquet as a memory of the wonderful occasion. Get a Prenuptial Agreement before Your Next Marriage While signing a prenuptial agreement can be one of the all-time romantic turnoffs, for people heading into their second marriage, a prenuptial agreement can give the trade-off of a better relationship through the security of financial and life planning.A prenuptial agreement is a legal contract between two people about to marry, specifying how assets will be distributed in the event of divorce or death. Planning A Wedding? Tips On How To Attend A Bridal Show If you're getting married, a Bridal Show is a great place to get started. Since 1996, I have attended or participated in over 150 Bridal Shows, and I thought I would pass on some tips to you, to make your trip a little easier. Marriage: Where is the Fairy Tale? "Presently, 40% of all first marriages in this country end in divorce. 60% of all second marriages and 75% of third marriages fail as well. How to Find the Right Bridesmaid Dresses for Your Wedding The kind of bridesmaid dresses your bridal attendants should should wear depends on the type of wedding you end up having.What's your wedding theme?Do you have a particular theme in mind? For instance, if you had a nautical theme for your wedding as a whole, you might want to have special sailor-style dresses for your bridesmaids. Marriage Counseling: What Do Husbands Really Want in a Wife? Because many men do not discuss feelings as easily as most women do, wives are often shocked when their husband actually voices his desire to separate or divorce. They might have suspected that their spouse wasn't entirely happy, but they didn't think he'd ever be the one to end the marriage. Divorce Rate Plummets As More Americans Shack Up Instead of Getting Married More Americans are taking "til death do us part" seriously. According to the recently released Rutgers University National Marriage Project the number of divorces is declining.
|
| home | site map |
| © 2006 |
